I'm happy to say that I made it back in one piece from Homecoming weekend in Nashville! I took my own advice and didn't try to party like I was 21, thank goodness. However, I must say, three nights of marathon dancing, laughing till you cry, running around, and continuous drinking are quite exhausting! BUT, I got to wear some delicious fall outifts and see my best girlfriends from college (which is totally worth being completely fried). My abs are literally sore from laughing so hard, so often. I'm afraid we wreaked havoc on Nashville once again!
There are a fresh crop of "Tales from the Hanger" from the weekend that are thoroughly enjoyable. I'll tell you a quick one.....
The Tale of the Winter White Laundry Skirt:
It was our second night in Nashville, and we were ready to party. "Sharkie", "Gaga", "Hannibal" and I got dolled up and decided we needed a photo shoot. Hannibal's apartment building is downtown, and the 31st floor has an amazing party/lounge area with a spectacular view. When the 4 of us get together, there is NEVER a dull moment. All weekend, we joked around that we were the 4 women from "Sex and the City", but no one wanted to be Miranda....so the whole trip we kept saying "wow, you sound just like Miranda" or "man, that outfit looks like something Miranda would wear", so naturally, on our way to the photoshoot on the roof, we make raunchy Miranda jokes and I defended myself against being called Samantha Jones. I was wearing a black cashmere/wool top with adorable chiffon ruffles and a winter white Laundry skirt that has a black belt (it's super cute) with black suede platform heels. I was definitely not giving off the "Miranda" vibe.
When we arrived upstairs, there was a gentleman sitting on the couch with his back to us watching "Deadliest Catch" on the plasma TV. He had very short salt and pepper hair, was wearing baggy jeans, a t-shirt, sneakers and had his feet propped up on the table in front of him. The girls prompted me to ask him to take our picture so I wouldn't have to set the automatic timer on my camera, so I walk over and start trying to get the man's attention. His back was to me, so I just said,
"Sir?.....excuse me? Sir!?"
I look back at the girls, make a "What the hell!?" face, and walk closer to the potentially deaf man. "EXCUSE ME, SIR?!"
SHE turned around and gave me the meanest look. SHE.woman.female.NOT a man. NOT a "sir".
"Can I help you?" she growled as she turned to face me.....yep...it was definitely not a man.
Mind you, the only people in the lounge were the girls, the she-man, and me. I wish I had this on camera. I have never experienced more of a "deer in headlights" moment in my life. I stuttered profusely, looked at the woman and squeaked. literally. Then, in an effort to recover my dignity, I asked if she would take our picture. She obliged, gave me another evil look, and took our picture. All four of us were trying so hard not to burst out in hysterical laughter that the picture in our "photo shoot" looks incredibly awkward. I'm stifling laughter/awkwardness and everyone else is doing the exact same. She took our picture, and we promply RAN out of the lounge, cutting our photo shoot short and unleashed the laughter in the elevator. This led to another weekend long joke, of calling women "sir", and men, "ma'am".
Stay tuned to hear about how "Hannibal" got her name this weekend, how we managed to convince two rednecks that we all spoke Swedish, "the sheet" story, the stolen guest list/clipboard story, "peanut boy", the "Hannibal body checks Julie into a cab story", the "Sharkie puts blush all over her face because she thinks its powder story", "Julie makes best friends with every cab driver in Nashville", and "Julie deflects men's advances by giving the MOST EVIL one liners" story and many more. Have a delicious Monday!