MIA....not just a badass musician

I AM SO MIA IT HURTS!

But guess what!?!

My cray cray business will be over as of THIS COMING SATURDAY AND I HAVE SO SO SO MUCH TO TELL YOU ALL!

and i promise i will start reading all of you beautiful blogs when saturday is over!  i miss blogging and reading your blogs!!!

peaceloveandhatingbeingsodarnbusy,
lovelovelove,

Life Lately

HAS BEEN STRAIGHT UP CRAY CRAY!


For realz, I literally have had no time to read blog, much less write my own which is super sad, but hopefully I'll be back up and running soon!


I will be leaving town this weekend for a wedding extravaganza (not my own) but when I'm back hopefully I will be able to bring everyone back to speed!


love and MISS y'all!


hugs from the south
peaceloveandnotimetospare,
lovelovelove,

Nooz

Lovahs and Friends,

I have some not so surprising nooz. Here goes: I am a crap-tastic blogger!

I have been so MIA it's not even funny! My life has been a whirlwind of being poolside, being up till 8 am, working, not working, playing, drinking too much beer, too much world cup, too little sleep, and SO MUCH FUN. I start my first big girl, REAL WORLD job in three weeks, so I'm trying to get it all out of my system!

However, the party will continue, but I will be an amazing blogger in about 3 weeks, I PINKIE PROMISE, GIRL SCOUTS HONOR.....

In other nooz, I'm leaving the country tomorrow for 9 days, so obvs, I won't be blogging. But when I get back I might post some pics, but who knows. Oh yeah and now my blog looks ugly and I don't have time to fix it....no me gusta. 

I have some animal whisperer stories, some concert recaps, some hilarious tidbits, and a little somethin' somethin' about me and Regina George to share with you when I get back!

I miss you all oodles and bunches and will be back in action for realz before you can say JagerBomb.....boom.roasted.

peaceloveandsummerrocks,

lovelovelove,

MEOWMIX

The title is just because. I like saying meowmix.

NOOZ:

1. Super apologies for sucking at blogging. 

2. I GOT A JOB! Member when I was all cray cray scared thinking I was going to have to start stripping? Well, fear not, because I'm officially a grown up! Only downside is  I don't start till August and I need a summer job...ideas? Anybody want to hire yours truly?

3. The past few weeks have been a whirlwind of cray cray but I secretly love that about life. I'm a lucky girl!

ROOLZ:

1. When it's 98 degrees outside and hot as BALLZ, please for the love of Miley WEAR DEODORANT PEOPLE. I was in line getting my passport the other day and damn near keeled over after catching a whiff of what was quite possibly THE.WORST.BO I've ever experienced. Holy holy holy guacamole. If smells could kill I'd be long gone. 

DOUBLE YOU TEA EFF WEDNESDAY:

Whore-moans have ONCE AGAIN kidnapped me for the day and I wish I could crawl into a little ball under my desk and die death by crampage and whore-moan kidnappage. BLAH. I need a Bloody Mary the size of Wisconsin and I need it NOW. Yeah it's only 1pm and I don't careeeee. 

I'll take TEN. And keep 'em comin'....

HAPPY SUMMER LOVAHS!

peaceloveandantiperspirantporfavor, 

lovelovelove, 

'Napped....

Ok Lovahs, I'm so so so sorry, I've been a bad bad blogger, like rilllly bad. But I have reasons.

A. I was in Austin this past weekend with my fam. I love my fam. Let me tell you, there is no better feeling than your 3 year old niece staring up at you and saying "I love you Aunt Julie, are you going to live here? Can we do makeovers and can you braid my hair"...PRICELESS. Also, top 10 life moments: Driving in the car, my sister in law puts on a "sing-a-long CD" and of course, Miley Cyrus "Party in the USA" comes on. I'm ecstatic, because in college, people called me Miley sometimes (not kidding) and my 3 year old niece KNOWS THE WORDS. I was SO PROUD. But then she corrected me, it's not "And a Jay-Z song was on.." It's actually, "And A Chinese Song was on..." So there you have it. Amazing.

B. I had a real live panic attack Monday afternoon. Of course I was in bumper to bumper traffic on the FREEWAY,so I couldn't pull over, so I was hyperventilating in my car, feeling like I was gonna yak, and trying not to basically completely melt down. Yeah. It happened. Haven't had one of those in 7 years.

C. I'm in the ROUGH part of my semester, which means I've been studying my face off, and have NO free time. Which is why I can't be a good blogger. I'm so sorry! I'll be back soon!

D. I got 'napped by whore-moans again. I'm not really sure if I'm totally back, but this time they came with a vengeance. NO BUENO.

So, I love y'all, I PROMISE I'll be back soon, please don't hate me or forget about me! And just for your viewing pleasure, I'm including a video of the monkey riding the dog I told you about from the rodeo.

peaceloveandMileyCyrus,

lovelovelove,

Tardy for the Party. I Know. I'm Sorry.

Friends and Lovers,Lover and Friends, 

Not only am I being kidnapped at the moment (this isn't the real  me posting, the real me has been sucked up by jerky whore-moans) but I have a flippin' midterm on Thursday that is, how do you say, IMPOSSIBLE TO STUDY FOR...So, needless to say, I might be a little MIA on the blogosphere till...oh...Next Tuesday. 

I have this midterm, then I have to work ALL WEEKEND LONG. Then I have a three hour long presentation Monday...and then ANOTHER three hour long presentation Tuesday. But then, I'm out of the woods and life will be all perfect and shiny and nice. Right? Yes. It will be. It has to be. 

Next Friday, I'm super majorly big-time hoping to go see Tyrone Wells in concert. He's a great singer/songwriter after my own heart. Amazing with words, and can sing his face off. Srsly. Don't believe me? Listen to him. Love him. I recommend "Sea Breeze" (one of my favorite songs evah and if he sings it next week I will literally melt. srsly.) "Baby Don't You Change" "Better Off Without You" and "Sink or Swim". 

So, in lieu of all the stuff I usually do during the week, I will leave you with a tiny taste of what's to come with sorority stories thanks to my inspiration at Speaking from the Crib. 

• The term "sorostitute" was used loosely among many members of the Greek community
• I was social chair of my sorority. I'm no stranger to a party. 
• I was also parliamentarian, which means I could throw down. Basically. 
• Put 200 or so females in a house for a week during rush and you're bound to see more Advil, tampons, lip gloss, cat fights, tears, cookies, pink glittery stuff and estrogen than you've ever wanted to imagine. 

Happy Tuesday Kids! 

Oh, also, I forgot to tell you. I hate Punxsutawney Phil. I don't care if you call PETA on my ass. That jerk is making a LOT of us freeze our heinies off, and I do NOT appreciate it. I am all in favor of animal rights, I volunteer at the SPCA for Pete's sake, but THIS IS WHERE I DRAW THE LINE. Phil, you owe us BIG next year...I'm talkin' you better turn Texas into the freaking Bahamas by next February. I mean it. Don't make me march my animal whisperer self up there to wherever it is you are and make me whisper you into submission....

wipe that smirk off your head...furry jerk.

Musique Du Jour:

Tyrone Wells, srsly he's awesome kids.He's been featured on Grey's Anatomy etc.

"Shark In The Water" VV Brown. (Acoustic Version)

"Awake My Soul" Mumford & Sons

"Revolver" Madonna feat. David Guetta and Lil Wayne

"Slow Down (The Way It Goes)" The Magic Numbers

"Untouchable" Taylor Swift. Yep I said it. I like her. Shut it. 

And since I know a lot of you guys might not take my amazing advice and listen to him, here's the video of him performing "Sea Breeze" watch it, then look me in the eyes and tell me it's not a beautiful song. And if you don't like it, then you can go hang out in a cave and freeze with Punxsutawney Phil. 

you're welcome. 

I'm Kind of a Genius....

Hola Amigos y Amigas, 

I'm like the poster child for ADD/ADHD today, since all I care about is going home and packing for Mardi Gras. Thanks to many of you, especially my girl over at Cake Called, I Answered, I now am FULLY prepared to face Mardi Gras and survive without losing anything but a little dignity perhaps. (Don't worry, there will be NO chesticle exposure from this girl, I like to keep it classy...) SO, I have devised a GENIUS plan. Firstly, I have threatened all parties in our group with death by dumping them in the swamp with gators if they let me get abducted by clown clans (say that 5 times fast...clown clan...) AND THEN, my genius, fail proof plan was hatched. SO, to ensure that I don't get lost/abducted/kidnapped/sucked up into a UFO by aliens, I will be suggesting that we use some of THESE babies. 

Is this not a brilliant idea???? C'mon. It's BRILLIANT.

1. Our protectors will be able to drag me wherever they want, and can steer me in any direction they deem safe/more fun. 

2. I can hold my wallet, phone, camera and lip gloss on my BACK and have BOTH hands free for my DRANK. PLUS the person steering/pulling me will have a bird's eye view of my treasure trove so no one will try to pick-pocket me. Or is it pick monkey?

3. It's pretty freakin' adorable. Maybe I can give my monkey some beads too...again. genius.

OK so, I'm thinking this will ensure maximum fun and safety, no? Gosh I surprise myself sometimes....

HOWEVER, I will once again threaten my care-takers with instant alligator swamp death if they pull THIS MOVE. Watch this video, you will die laughing slash want this mother slapped. This will NOT be happening. I will be merrily prancing down the streets of NOLA carefree and safe, with a safety monkey on my back!

cray cray. 

PEE ESS. Member when I was creeped out that the guy from Verizon emailed me all creepily? WELL HE DID IT AGAIN YESTERDAY. This is a joke. CAN I GET A WITNESS!?

I HATE When I Get Kidnapped....Such An Inconvenience

Yes, I was kidnapped this weekend, and I'm back. Before you get all "ohmygoshareyouok!?" on me, let me be the first to tell you, this isn't the first time I've been 'napped. 

So, basically, these evil creatures called "whore-moans" come to earth, steal me, and replace me with a different version of myself. Basically, the "fake" me, is super emo, gets misty eyed when she drops her pen, listens to whiny music, eats chocolate like it's the last edible thing on earth, and is very "woe is me". So basically, my weekend consisted of my "fake" self schlepping around in my pink leopard pajamas, watching movies, drinking wine, eating Nestle "Flipz" and missing my "real" self who was taken up to space with those assholes called "whore-moans". PLUS it was a full moon, and that just made shit worse.  For instance, I met a friend for lunch, and I was wearing black yoga pants, a black wool turtleneck, my wayfarers, and a baseball hat. He asked me if I was in espionage school, or if I was trying to channel a celebrity in hiding. If you know me at all, you will know that if you ever see me in a baseball hat, I'm either 1. going to be outdoors all day 2. have been abducted my "whore-moans" and the thought of brushing my hair makes me want to stick needles in my eyes. 

basically.

So, now that I'm back, I'm very happy to return to "normal" me instead of "fake and emo" me. Because nobody likes a whiner. However, the weather in Houston has been so shistey that the only way I could stop myself from turning around dead in my tracks this morning in the freezing rain was by chanting "FML, FML FML, FML, FML, FML" on the walk to work this morning. It took my mind off the fact that I couldn't feel my frozen claws fingers gripping my umbrella-ella-ella-ay-ay-ay and frozen toes. 

Sooo, get excited guys, because in the next few hours, I will be losing my guest-post v-card! My friend Neil will be posting about the fact that he won the first place award at a Jersey Shore themed party this weekend. Neil is a total gangsta and I'll give you the word on him as soon as he finishes his post....ahem. Neil, that's your cue to hurry the eff up. Deadlines...deadlines my friend. 

So, this morning, during my "FML" chanting walk to work, someone asked if I was a Vampire... Wait, stop, rewind. Let me break it down for you. 

Human: "What are you a vampire or something"

Me/Vampire Me: "Uhh...why do you ask?"

Human: "Well, it's raining and grey, and you're wearing dark sunnies"

Me/Vampire Me: Evil Grin, very a la Cheshire Cat/Dwight Schrute when he grins like an evil goblin....I will never blow my cover....Edward WHO?

Last weekend, I was in a "mood" and was too hungover to be bar hopping. Plus my friend made me walk like 984573 miles down the street in rilllllllllly high heels. So, we went to this bar that was supposed to be "amazing". Um. Not so much. There were trolls every.where. So as we walk in, I loudly observe "What the hell is this, a Lord of the Rings audition!?".....Can I Get A Witness?

Chanson Du Jour:

Band of Skulls- Fires

Sia- Satellite Heart

The Middle East- Lonely and Fool's Gold

White Rabbits- Company I Keep

Delphic- This Momentary

Pee Ess: I'm about to go snatch this broad's phone from the office if she doesn't turn down the damn ringtone...for srs. Maybe the bodysnatchers are back for round two of 'napping me...damn. Just when I thought I was back in action.