Posts
Lovahs,
I have my LAST MIDTERM OF LIFE in 3 hours. So I'm cramming....and blogging. This will be my last post till Sunday or so (don't cry, I'll be back in FULL hurricane force next week!) I will be working a tent at the HOUSTON LIVESTOCK SHOW AND RODEO, which is a pretty big deal here in H-town. While you're missing me, I'd like you to help me solve this mystery. We'll call it "The Mystery of the White Powder in the Ladies Room In Jules Bear's Office"....
So. The ladies' room in our building has three stalls. We share the restroom with one other floor. You with me? K good. SO, somehow, someway, always in the afternoon, I find a sprinkling of WHITE POWDER on the toilet seat of the very far right stall. Umm....?????. Is someone hitting the slopes at lunchtime for a quick drug induced pick-me-up? Is it baby powder? Is a baby using the toilet? Is someone sprinkling their lady parts with baby powder? Is it rat poison? WHAT IS IT?! Help. Please. I need to know if a Colombian drug cartel is going to invade my office, so I can be prepared with sling-blades, nun-chucks, and any other necessary items, including my invisibility cloak. Can I Get A Witness?!
Like this. but on the toilet seat. HELP!!!
Now. Since I don't have much time for stories. I will show you some pictures. It's my day for show and tell.
EXHIBIT A:
This is what I drink my tea out of every morning. It's really really big, you can't really tell. But it keeps my tea hot. Oh what's that? It's got a pic of my boyfriend on it? Oh yeah, no big deal....I mean I know most people don't have pics of their boyfriend on their tea cups, but he's not a "normal boyfriend". Sometimes I am sipping my tea and I look over and people are giving me the side eye because they're probz jealous of my boyfriend tea cup. Aren't you?
EXHIBIT B:
Last night. I was studying for my midterm. I got a wee bit ADD....And remember that song I told you to listen to??? "Shark In The Water" by VV Brown? Well I'm obsessed. And I'm also OBSESSED with the new Robin Thicke album "Sex Therapy" jumphopskip over to www.lala.com and listen to it for free NOW. ESPECIALLY the song "It's in the Mornin'" I have been listening to these two songs on repeat for 2 days now. GO. NOW. You'll thank me and want to kiss me on the face.
Now I must return to crammage for this exam, then I'm off to be my little cowgirl self. (Wow, can you tell I'm cracked out....!?) So, yee-haw and I'll be back soon!
peacelove&cowboyboots.
lovelovelove,
Jules.
PREPARE TO BE OBSESSIONATED.
Last of life?? WHATTTT. lucky.
ReplyDeleteLOVE the cup and doodle.
There is def a cracked out co-worker lurking about the office. You should leave a straw in the stall, but roll up a tiny note inside that says "I know who you are." This will really send them into a drug induced paranoia. Instant office entertainment.
ReplyDeleteIt's probably just Ajax or some kind of cleaning product. Maybe. But weird that it's just one stall. And is that your handwriting? Sooooo pretty!
ReplyDeleteSomeone was eating sherbet in the loo. Isn't that obvious??? ;P
ReplyDeleteGold Bond powder. . . . works wonders for chafing. Not to mention it feels all tingly too.
ReplyDeleteFirst Mardi Gras and now a Rodeo??? Sheesh - you are living the life. But again - no invite for me. Fine. Meredith said I can go with her next year anyway. So there.
ReplyDeleteCool doodle. Can you make me one?
Maybe someone is baking in the loo and it's flour?
Good luck on the mid-term. Champers to celebrate after perhaps?
Nothing like Rodeo time in Houston. I was gonna do the rodeo run but decided I'd rather drink instead. Have fun!
ReplyDeleteAh! I LOVE that VV Brown song as well! LOVE IT. And Robin Thicke. My, we are peas in a pod!
ReplyDeleteHave you heard Melanie Fiona - Monday Morning ? Reminds me a bit of VV.
you sure lindsey lohan isn't working PT at your office?! those white powder sightings usually involve my favorite crackhead.
ReplyDeletegood luck on the midterm. last one, woop woop!!!
my grandma and grandpa drink their coffee out of coffee mugs that have their grandchildren's photos on the side. it weirds me out. and you know what, i think we have the same boyfriend? he didn't give me a cup, though. he made me a vamp. haha
ReplyDeleteGood luck on your midterm!! I'm with bananas, it was probably Lindsey Lohan's powder!!
ReplyDeleteHaha oh white powder... Good luck on midterms and lay off the caffeine haha otherwise you'll go through withdrawal!
ReplyDeleteMaybe it's some sort of toilet bowl cleaner?!?! I'm trying/hoping your office mates aren't all on some mid day coke binge.
ReplyDeleteGood luck on your last midterm! YAY! That's the best feeling evahhhhhh!
I'm really hoping it's baby powder cause someone had the sweats or something going on down there today. Creepy . . .
ReplyDeleteAnd tots congrats on the last mid term. The best feeling ever!!
And totally jealous that you'll be working the cookoff/rodeo. I freaking miss being in H-town for that reason. Love it.
1. Would someone really waste good coke? (I've never done coke. Just sayin'.)
ReplyDelete2. I am uber jealous of your tea cup. I want one.
3. I'm loving Robin Thicke's album.
Just wanted to tell you that your blog has become a staple read for me during my long, boring workdays!!! So interesting to hear from someone living in the South b/c as a Cali girl I've never been there and have NO idea what it is like.
ReplyDeleteAlso, love your taste in music!
clearly the powder is the feminine powder some stanky broads use on their vagine. esp if found on toilet seat. have linked up your last post with mine today.
ReplyDelete