Friends and Lovahs, Lovahs and Friends,
I'm going to the rodeo tonight to see Mr. Keith Urban!!!!!!!!! I'm uber.excited. I'll take some pics for all you non-texans. I'm praying I can catch the show where a tiny monkey dressed up as a cowboy rides a border collie dressed as a horse, it's the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life.
So, I have a male beefer who was bitching about him not being mentioned in my blog. Even though I did his damn laundry for two years in college. He knows I heart him to the moon and back, so here's his mention. I will tell a story about him that is both embarrassing and endearing, because that's what I do.
One night, we all went out on the town in Nashville. Beverages were consumed, the dance floor was DOMINATED by us, and cab drivers feared us (totally standard for us). I had intense eye sex with a cute stranger the entire night, and when he came over to talk to me, I said "It's about damn time." (I'm very blunt...oopsies...but he liked it and we actually ended up dating for a while)...I DIGRESS.
So, girl beefer and boy beefer and I headed back to boy beefer's house because he had booze and we wanted to late-night. Then I noticed boy and girl beefer batting eyelashes and flirting. Oh.Sweet.Jeebus.
Next thing I know, I'm alone, on the couch, sipping on a beer, and waiting for girl and boy beefer to finish whatever it was that they were doing upstairs. They were always "friends" but I'm pretty sure they were in the process of getting EXTRA friendly.
Girl beefer and I are close. THISCLOSE. So we say whatever we want to each other. So, when girlbeefer FINALLY stumbles downstairs, I'm highly amused, because now I can give my beefers HELL for as long as possible. The following convo ensued.
Me: "Umm...so were y'all folding laundry or sucking face??"
Girl Beefer: "What!? No, we were just talking, nothing happened, jeez chill out..."
Me: "OH, so is that why your top is on INSIDE OUT?!"
Girl Beefer: "Oh. shit. Um. Well. Shit. DON'T SAY ANYTHING"
Me: "Oh...don't worry... I won't" meanwhile evil Cheshire Cat grin/Dwight Schrute evil face is in FULL FORCE. I had ammo, and you can bet your ass I was gonna use it.
The end. LOVE YOU GIRL AND BOY BEEFERS. And I know you love me for giving you hell. You so love it.