Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Double You Tea Eff Wednesday and "Can I Get A Witness?"

Lovers and Friends, Friends and Lovers,

I'm chock-full of juicy gems for you and so it begins with a new cult tradition. "Double You Tea Eff Wednesday" (which will obviously be happening on Wednesdays, and because it's more fun to spell it that way). Basically, I will be sharing with you some random facts, observations, personal habits, and other juicy fruits of my life that make me go, "DOUBLE YOU TEA EFF!" (WTF, in other words for you more visual learners). I've blogged in the past about some 'double you tea eff' moments, and since I feel like these happen often, it's going to be on the reg now. You're welcome. So here goes:

-I've been so so so tired the past three days, and when I finally climb into bed for night-night, my body's all "hey, let's get up and dance, I've got energy now" and I'm all "you're a big jerk, body" and I toss and turn for 2 hours....WTF body!?
-I thought that boys would get the hint if my responses to their texts and calls were monosyllabic words like "yep" "nope" and "cool" (I even threw in an "I'm leaving town this weekend and won't be by my phone...which was totes not true)...apparently not. This means I have to sack up and say "I'm just not that into you" and I'm kind of emotionally non-adept in those situations.....WTF boys!?
-My VS swimsuit I ordered will only be arriving to me in half. The top is back-ordered till February 24th...this means I can't try it on daily and stare at myself till it looks hawt. WTF Vickie's!? 
- I never watched Gossip Girl, I always was so poz it would be a terrible show, and a waste of my life. Well, thanks to Netflix, I'm a little bit addicted. I'm pissed. WTF Netflix and GG? (Sidenote to Carissa...I am also addicted to Dexter...this is very.very.bad.)

And now, I have another special treat. "Can I Get A Witness". Basically, as I've already shared with you in previous posts, the campus I attend grad school at is.....interesting. There are daily occurrences that make me die a little. So, I need to share them, because some of them are once in a lifetime things. I will take pictures when I can, but sometimes these creatures and moments are fleeting and elusive, so a mental pic will have to do. Capiche? Here goes:

-Today I was driving into the parking lot, and standing on the corner was a mid-30's man, wearing aviators and a porn stache. I think he was trying for the "hipster" vibe and accidentally crossed over into "dirty perv"...My reaction: simultaneous shiver and cringe, "shinge" or "criver"....and I almost hit the curb. Can I Get A Witness?

they might even be related. srsly.

-I was walking into the office, when a girl walked past me, and I AM NOT KIDDING when I say she smelled EXACTLY like grape Dimetapp. My mouth even watered...NOT in a good way. She literally must've bathed in Grape Dimetapp. Can I Get A Witness?
- Yesterday, I was waiting for the elevator, and some dude was waiting next to me. He was the "manly" man, in a football jersey, obviously spends way too much time at the gym, and is probs on the juice if you know what I mean. I gave him the "ew, you're creepy" glare, and then I had to share oxygen with him in the elevator. When we get in the elevator, there are two other randos in it. We get in, and I shit you not, his Ipod is BLASTING Lady Gaga's "paparazzi"....I was doing the whole cough/laugh and everyone else in the elevator kept awkwardly looking at each other and cough/laughing while 'tough guy' stared on ahead...Can I Get A Witness?

musique du jour:
The Artist "Hot Chip". I'd heard them before, but I now am a full-fledged lovah of their stuff. Try them out, you'll love. Trust.

Here's my fave song by them for now...giggidy. 


  1. Haha! Love the one about the guy who isn't taking the hint. Isn't it ANNOYING when guys act like girls??? ;P

  2. Hilarious!!! (all of it, but I especially like the guy trying to be a hipster, but crossed the line to perv). And seriously? The needy guys...suggest to them that they read and watch "He's Just Not That In To You" and substitute "he" for "she"

  3. Sac up! Subtlety is not what we (meaning Men) do well.

  4. A while back I got addicted to Gossip girl, luckily I got distracted by Dexter so i think I'm done with it for now... And I wish I had that problem with guys? I'm the one usually like obsessively waiting for a return text... I mean.. just kidding. But for real.. kinda.

    Anyways, I'm really loving this Wtf wed. idea. I might have to join in as I have many many many WTF moments myself!!!

  5. too funny about the dimetapp...lady who came into my office the other day smelled just like pledge furniture polish...made me want to clear my desk and ask her to rub herself on it, well maybe not!

  6. I laughed really super hard at the paparazzi story.

  7. So funny! I laughed when you mentioned "sharing oxygen" with unsavory individuals on the elevator. I feel the EXACT same way when I see yucky people getting on the elevator with me. :D

  8. Ha ha... I know all about trying something on and staring at it till it looks good!

  9. I wonder where I fall in the Hipster/Perv curve???

    The mind wonders

  10. I just get right too it and text them "I'm not feeling the chemistry, I hope you understand" Rather than having to deal with them texting and not getting the idea for a while. And saying it in a text is much easier than (and requires less balls) than phoning them up. Just a suggestion :)

  11. Lovely blog :) its really interesting :) happy new year to you :) !

  12. OMG grape dimetapp is my nightmare. that shit tramautized my taste for grape flavored anything. it's so gross! i've never experienced one actually smelling like it. i think i would've puked right then and there. can i get a witness!

  13. these are so funny, especially the perv pic!

  14. a) I'm baaaack . . .
    b) love the new feature(s)
    c) love the new header

    Sheesh - I go away for one stinking week and you turn the place upside down!


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