Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Reason #934875398 Why I'm Regina George, but it's ok because it cancels out...


K, so member how I told you I'm pretty much Regina George's twin but not blonde? So I had another Regina moment in class yesterday. There I was, minding my own business, when a classmate started flipping out about the class computer not working and she had to present. So, me being a good person volunteered my laptop for her to use in class. (This was more of a Cady Heron sweet innocent moment, not Regina)...

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This was a BIG sacrifice, because I fully intended on using these class hours to read your blogs and play catch up. Fast forward to the end of class, where I get my laptop back and am happily blogging away. I look over. Girl who borrowed my laptop pulls a bottle of "Lubriderm" intensive healing lotion out of her backpack. NO big. I figure she's a fan of moisturizing...in class..weird but not superweird. THEN I SAW IT. She was rubbing lotion on a HUGE HUGE BUMPY RED RASH ON HER HANDS AND ARMS. THE SAME HANDS AND ARMS THAT WERE JUST TOUCHING MY LAPTOP. WHAT THE EFFING EFF.

It was taking EVERYTHING inside of me not to yak, cry, and start flailing my arms hysterically and screaming "OH SICK, OH THIS IS EFFING SICK, HOE EM EFFING GEE NOW I'M GOING TO CATCH EBOLA OR WHATEVER AVIAN FLU GERMS THIS TRICK JUST INFECTED ONTO MY LAPTOP, WHERE IS THE PURELL??! I NEED A GAS MASK. HOE EM GEE WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE, WHAT IF THIS IS FLESH EATING BACTERIA!!!!!!!". I frantically paw through my bag looking for my germ gel, empty half of it onto my hands and arms, all while MAJORLY staring and stink eye-ing rash girl, and then shut my computer off, closed it and PRAYED that my germ gel would kill the rash bugs DEAD. I'm HIGHLY considering taking some foot cream to her next week and saying "this really helps rashes"...or maybe some super strong acid that will burn flesh off...because no one messes with my skin. NO ONE. DOUBLE YOU TEA EFF SKIN RASHES.

MOVING ON. 

My Regina George-ness was later cancelled out by the fact that I am a super human animal whisperer/PETA should hire me to be the animal ambassador or something like that. K so here's the lowdown. I was running yesterday, and I run on this like nature trail thing. It's rillly pretty and relaxing and awesome. So, I'm finishing up my run, when lo and behold, I see a moving object in the grass right by my foot. What was it!? It was this. 

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CUTEST MINI-BUNNY IN.THE.WORLD.EVER.SRSLY.EVERRRRR.

Hold the phone. This is THE CUTEST thing I have EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE. So what does Jules-Bear AKA expert animal whisperer do?! I squat on the trail, and whisper to bunny. Bunny DID NOT run away, bunny hopped over to my feet, looked up at me, nibbled some clover, and we spoke bunny LOVE to each other for like ten minutes. I'm serious. People kept stopping, thinking I was hurt or dying of a cramp, only to notice my expertise in animal whispering and would gasp in amazement that bun-bun was hanging out with me, not scared AT ALL. I was so so so pissed that I don't run with my phone, and I SERIOUSLY considered putting bun-bun in my shirt and taking it home, but I remembered that bunnies have heart attacks really easily and I DID NOT want bad animal karma and bunny blood on my hands. So, me and bun-bun parted ways, and I finished my run. CAN I GET A WITNESS!? THE END. But see how my animal kindness cancels out my Regina-ness? It totes does. 


until tomorrow,  peacelove&tinybunnies&prayingidon'thaveebola/avianflu/flesheatingbacteria
lovelovelove, 

14 comments:

  1. OMG that is so gross. I would totally freak out!

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  2. haha 2 equally amusing stories. bet mr bun-bun enjoyed the company for a bit lol

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  3. omg why can i TOTALLY see you doing this... bahahaha

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  4. Sorry about the skin disease, but what I'm really concerned about is the fact that you don't take a phone on your runs! What if you got into trouble? Or came across someone else in trouble? I don't like this one bit. You hear me!

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  5. if talking to bunnies cancels out your regina george-ness, what cancels out mine?

    i'm regina george-ish every day of my life! minus the blonde hair and green eyes or whatever she had.

    happy humpers day friend!

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  6. HAHHAHAh i would of freaked.

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  7. The moral of the laptop anecdote is clear . . . do not lend anyone your laptop EVER AGAIN!

    The end.

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  8. hahah, i seriously laughed out loud while reading this. that is so cute. it totally cancels out your regina george tendencies. :)

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  9. oh my gosh, your bunny story is absolutely adorable! i started cracking up when you mentioned bunny heart attacks!

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  10. You're a bunny whisperer??

    I am so envious of your gift!

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  11. You talked to a bunny? That is amazing. I would have ran away from it. Why? Wild animals tend to scare me, even if they are cute bunnies.

    So, the rash lady....it was most likely psoriasis or something non-communicable, so I wouldn't freak too much.

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  12. I read this last week on my phone and I can't believe I'm not commenting til now.. My week was cray cray! Thanks for being such a good friend and I need a weekend update ASAP! And I need you to dog whisper my dog because I think she stopped loving me.

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  13. OMG that is so rude and so groos!!!!!!!

    i want to speak bunny love! how cute!!1

    xoxo

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