Manic Monday

Hi Loves, 
Sorry it's been so long, apparently graduating from graduate school should be a priority of mine, so I took it upon myself to show responsibility and trick myself into getting work done...which kind of worked, but I'm still up to my ears in paper writing...which is not NEARLY as enjoyable as blog writing...obvi. 


Today I want to express my love of sunglasses. I know many who hate them, never wear them, or perpetually lose them. I do not fit into either of the aforementioned categories. Without sunnies, I am not OK. I wear them every. single. day. I don't care if it's grey out, I've got those suckers firmly planted on. Here's why:


I love them. If that isn't enough for you, then here's some more. I have also convinced myself that sunnies are vital tools for maintaining healthy eyes/vision, and since I have 20/15 vision (which, if you don't know is kind of close to like Superman vision...just sayin') I feel like this gives me proof that I'm right. Also, I think they add a certain air of mystery, and mystery is always fun. Another juicy morsel:  I NEVER lose things. I'm not kidding, I survived all of college without losing a SINGLE thing. The only thing you could say I lost was a little dignity every so often on a Saturday night, and then I had a sweatshirt stolen...NOT lost, but stolen. 


So here are my favorite sunnies:


Ray Ban Aviators with graduated brown lenses. These are amazing. I love the way they look, although they aren't ideal for super super sunny-ness, but they're lightweight, comfy and I love the classic look. 

Ray Ban Wayfarers in Tortoise. I have the smaller frames, since I have a smaller face. I LOVE these. Once again with the classic look, but these def. offer more sun protection, and the uber dark lenses make for perfect hangover sunnies, or great for a day on the boat. I love how I can wear them with brown or black, and they go with my hair color! Sidenote: I also am convinced that they will bring me closer to vampire-dom....yep, I'm insane. I highly recommend these sunnies, I literally wear them ALL the time, very a la Taylor Jacobson. 

My Chanel Mother of Pearl Sunnies in Brown. These babies are definitely more glam than the previously mentioned sunnies, so I typically wear these on more dressy/glam occasions. The only thing I don't like about them is the graduated lenses get so light that you can see my eyes in pictures, and that can get awkward. However, I love the shape of the frame, they're very flattering, and of course, who doesn't love some Chanel in their life?

I feel naked being outdoors without sunnies on, and if I ever DO forget to bring them, or run out sunnie-less, I'm usually a bit disgruntled...nothing personal. 

In other news: I saw New Moon, loved it. Had a problem with some minor issues, and felt like a total cougar while ogling the ridiculously ripped Jacob. Dear Lord, is it natural for 16 year olds to look like that?! It's not fair! ALSO: I LOVE the soundtrack for this movie. I'm a music junkie, and I notice things like soundtracks...maybe that's dorky but I don't care. They did a spectacular job with the soundtrack. I was tickled when I heard Bon Iver on there!

Music/Bands Du Jour: 

Band of Horses- try them out. spectacular band. Fave songs- "Marry Song" and "Funeral"

"Vanished" -Crystal Castles

"Tear You Apart" - She Wants Revenge. Delicious song. 

"Vidral Vel Til Loftarasa" - Sigur Ros. One of my favorite bands that makes Iceland look sexier than ever. 

"Rotten Love" - Levy

"Roll the Credits" - Peter Bjorn and John. I love love love their music. 

"M79"- Vampire Weekend. Another favorite. 

"Ice Cream" - New Young Pony Club

"Close to Me" - The Get Up Kids. Another band I heart. I missed them in concert last week. Thanks grad school. 
"12:51" - The Strokes
"Don't You Evah" - Spoon. Love Spoon. Amazing.
"Unconditional " and "The Ocean (Alt Version)" - The Bravery
"Old Yellow Bricks"  and "Fluorescent Adolescent"- Arctic Monkeys
"One Month Off" - Bloc Party

That Time I Took Stripper 101 in Vegas.

Yeah...I did it. Now I'm gonna tell you about it. 


Last Winter, right before Christmas, some of my besties from Vandy and some of their male companions (I was single and ready to Vegas style mingle) went to Vegas for a weekend. I had never been, and my first experience was ree-dick-you-lus...ty. We had an amazing suite at the Palazzo (part of the Venetian) and partied our panties off. After almost suffering a heart attack the first night at the Palms, we partied in TAO, the amazing club in the Venetian where girls sit naked in bathtubs with flower petals pasted on their boobies, and they dance...in bathtubs...and half naked girls hump each other on beds...it was awkward/amazing at the same time. We also attended Jamie Foxx's birthday party with the likes of P.Diddy/Puff Daddy/whatever the hell he calls himself nowadays. 


I need to tell you how I almost had a heart attack. I'm terrified of heights. TERRIFIED. I get vertigo, and feel the need to pass out. So, after drinking a lot, we went onto the balcony to shake it. I was happily staying away from the edge of the balcony (which is clear glass....um scary) and then I looked down. And almost died. This is what I could see. But it was night. And I had been drinking. And everything in Vegas is lit up so you feel like you're on some weird acid trip. 

scary? YES.

SO, that's how I almost had a meltdown at the Palms. I sprinted indoors in my stilettos, never to return to that godforsaken balcony again. The end. 

Now onto the Stripper 101 story. My friend's boyfriend had arranged for us to take Stripper 101 at the Hard Rock Hotel. The class included a free cocktail (fist pump) and an individual and group photo. I have since incinerated said photos, and my BFFL from Vandy and Stripper 101 classmate ALP has the group photo...that's why I'm still nice to her...so she won't blackmail me with this pic (Just kidding troll, you know I love you forever). Basically, we all put on workout clothes, and I was POSITIVE that I was going to know more than our Stripper Instructor. Don't ask me why I think I'd be better, it's just that I'm kind of competitive and figured...how hard can grinding up on a pole really be?? 

So into Stripper 101 we go...Sufficiently cocktailed, we made our way into the studio, where flash photography is prohibited, and then we had to Clorox bleach wipe our poles down. EW. EW. EW. I was so grossed out by realizing that I had a USED pole. Blech...luckily vodka was coursing through my veins and I cleaned off my pole. Then..our teacher came in. She was RIPPED. I'm talkin' six pack, buff arms, and legs that were just plain ridic. She then tells us how she's an ex "dancer" and how she's had THREE KIDS. THREE KIDS. with a body like that. I hated her already. A lot. 

So first on the lineup was the lap dance. Ok, seriously, who needs to learn how to do a lap dance?? Doesn't every woman already know how!?!?! I found this boring....but secretly fun, except there was something missing from the chair I was dancing on. Our stripper was using the weirdest metaphors for intimate body parts. EX: "Tease him, don't rub your COOKIE on his PIÑATA quite yet...make him wait." Cookie?? Piñata?? double you- tee-eff lady. Either you're spending too much time around your kids or your husband has some weird requests. 

Then we got to try our pole skills. Um. Ouch? I was able to get on the pole, swirl around, and do some other tricks, but DEAR LORD, I looked like I had been the victim of a brawl afterwards. I was COVERED in random bruises and bumps for days! And all I had to wear in Vegas were minidresses and skirts! So I walked around looking fierce with bruises...Anywho, at the end of the class, our stripper told us to pose for a group pic, since there were five of us in our little girl group. We all posed seductively around the pole and look like a bunch of drunk skanks. Not my proudest moment. Again, I will have to maintain friendship with ALP in order to ensure this pic never makes it way to the public, especially when I'm famous (ALP, I heart you...burn the pic already). 

So that's where my career as a stripper began...and promptly ended. We also got "authentic" stripper license, with our stripper names written on them . My stripper name is "Daisie" and yes of course I still carry the card in my wallet, and sometimes after too many cocktails I pull it out and show it to everyone (that's what she said). 

Stripper teacher spelled my name wrong. It's DAISIE. It's classier that way.

So, all in all, Vegas was awesome, ALP and I had some hysterical after hours adventures involving Joaquin Phoenix look alikes, "mercenaries", and witnessing a guy in our group hire a hooker, go into a room with her, come out five minutes later, only to say "That just cost me 105 dollars. " I'd say that was a successful Vegas trip. I can't wait to go back. As for Stripper 101, don't do it if you're planning on exposing your legs/arms. I'm flexible and in decent shape and I STILL came out looking like I'd been beaten up. 

Happy Hump Day!

Typical Tuesday? I Think NOT! More Like...Tumultuous Tuesday!

I have had the NUTTIEST day so far. Here's why:

1. I woke up on the RIGHT side of the bed this time...I'm having a GREAT hair day, and it's cold out so I got to wear tights, BOOTS, and a sweater dress!!!

2. I passed about 4 car wrecks on my way to the office this morning...I think there's something in the air...I hope everyone was ok

3. I was pulling into the parking lot (I work on campus where I go to grad school...no I don't work at the freaking food court, I'm an editor) and I saw a young dude walking with two cops. I assumed his car had been broken into (my campus is in a super scary/ghetto part of town) and I thought nothing of it. I parked, and realized that the cops and the dude were right next to me. I was letting the end of "Fergalicious" play (another mood booster) and next thing I know, I hear yelling...the dude was trying to beat up the cops, there were some expletives yelled, and then he's down on the ground struggling to get away. I was slack-jawed...still in the car...freaking the hell out. Umm...what do I do? I didn't want to get out for fear that psycho dude would accost me, so I sat and stared, BBMed (BlackBerry Messenger...if you don't know...you have no idea...) Sarah a series of "OMG OMG OMG you won't believe what I'm seeing right now" texts, and contemplated taking a picture (normal?)...Then 4 more cops came running, I figured I was safe...and fled from the scene, I ran my little Coach boots across the parking lot as quickly as possible, while balancing my container of homemade cranberry sauce (We're having a company "Thanksgiving" today) and my HUGE work tote. 

So last night, I was exhausted, but I had to make my homemade cranberry sauce for my office party. My cranberry sauce is unbelievable, I must say. If you want the recipe, email me and I'll give it! It's really pretty healthy (as far as cranberry sauce goes) and it's just amazing. So here's how it went down...(I was in a robe while cooking...obvi) 

this is my homemade cran sauce! So delish..this is an actual pic! I love how pretty it looks!

I also was accompanied by my sous chef...aka a bottle of Merlot, and below you will see a picture of my faithful apprentice. 

Meet Sushi. My diva princess pup who was begging for something to fall on the floor to lick up.

Another tidbit: Dry Shampoo is discriminatory. I read an article in Glamour this week about how you should only shampoo your hair 2x a week. I wash my hair AT LEAST every other day, and shower every day, so I invested in some dry shampoo. Luckily, I don't have greasy hair, but last night I decided to give it a try since my hair was looking a little flat, and I didn't feel like showering again and having to blow dry. I read the directions, sprayed the stuff into the roots, worked it in, waited, and brushed it out. VOILA!!! grey hair....Are you serious with that sh*t??? This would only work for a blonde!!!!!! So I looked like I had aged say..oh...50 years, but my hair looked nice, minus the GREY. So, I'm going to try it again because maybe I put too much in, but if not, then I'll have to give it to a blonde person. (I don't necessarily think blondes have more fun, but they might have more advantage in the dry shampoo area)

In other news, I'm getting pretty flippin' excited for Turkey Day and the premiere of NEW MOON!!!

MUSIQUE DU JOUR:

Soma- The Strokes

Unforgettable Season- Cut Copy

I Summon You- Spoon

I Will Posses Your Heart- Deathcab For Cutie

Never Gonna Happen- Lily Allen

In My Lady's House- Iron & Wine

Lights On- The Pierces

Love Like A Sunset Part II- Phoenix
Tulips (Club Remix)-  Bloc Party

An Amalgamation of Sorts...

First order of the day.. 2 questions/letters.

Dear People Walking In the Mall Yesterday While I Was Trying to Run Errands, 

Did you learn to walk in a field of cows? Do you have any bovine family members? Or are you just that thick in the head? When you hear/see someone walking behind you and giving you evil death stares, don't block the entire path, don't turn and look dumb (you might have not been trying to look dumb..but you do) and don't give a blank stare...I'm trying to walk past you. Step aside, and let me through please!!! I know I'm a ridiculously fast walker and I look like I'm a bat out of hell, but just as I am trying as hard as I possibly can to respect your bovine walking habits, try to respect my speedier walking habits. Thanks so much, oh and FYI..."Bui Yah Kah" is not haute couture. Just sayin'....

Dear Woman (Beotch) Working at Starbucks, 

I treat myself once a week to a sweet latte. So, as you can imagine, when I got in line yesterday to order my treat, I was pretty damn stoked. LAST WEEK, I was introduced to the Creme Brulee Latte at my normal Starbie's location. So, this week, I wanted to repeat the order. The man taking my money said you had the Creme Brulee Latte...so you can also imagine how offended I was when you looked at me and said "It's not out yet"...and don't look all surprised when I bark back..." That's funny, because I had one LAST week"...I know you don't know me, but you don't wanna mess with this. So, when you tell me "Other Starbucks locations may have started it, but we haven't" I'm pretty ridiculously annoyed   enraged...HOW HARD is it to add a different flavor of syrup to my Latte??? Seriously?!?! Are you the Dwight Schrute of Starbie's?? My Vanilla Latte should've been on the house, and you should be no longer working at Starbie's...so there. sip on THAT, beotch.

I just want my FREAKING coffee.

As you may be able to note, I definitely woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. I got 3 hours of sleep, and my diva puppy decided she wanted to play fetch at 3 am...just because I'm awake doesn't mean I want to play. BUT, on the upside, it's chilly out so I can wear fall/winter clothes!

Later, I'll post a Tale From The Hanger because it's been a while!

Also, has anyone actually SEEN in person, the Jimmy Choo line for H&M? We Texans don't have an H&M so I'm sad that I can't experience them firsthand!!!

Musique Du Jour:

Breathe- Telepopmusik

Do The Panic- Phantom Planet

Mistaken For Strangers- The National

Lake Michigan- Rogue Wave

Sexy Boy- Moon Safari

Cherryblossom Girl- Air

And They All Looked Broken Hearted-  Quatre Tete

Losing My Edge- LCD Soundsystem

Somersault-  Zero 7

Remind Me-  Royksopp

Film- Aphex Twin

Heartbeats- Jose Gonzalez (I LOVE him)

No Signs of Pain-  Azure Ray

Special Death- Mirah

If There's Ever a Reason-  Derby

Falalala Friday

The title is supposed to remind you of 'Tis the Season to be Jolly.....or not....whatevs, I just thought I'd try to put you in a cheery mood!

I was supposed to road trip today to Dallas and Austin, but I slept through my alarm and now it's too late...I'm so mad at myself. But I guess my body needed the rest, so now I'm less afraid of contracting the swine flu since my immune system is stronger due to more sleep....at least that's the way I'm thinking (it helps me sleep at night to justify these things to myself...don't bust my bubble)

I went "window-shopping" yesterday because I'm trying to practice self control, and I found about 274893 things that I decided would be necessary in order to complete my wardrobe (note: "completing" my wardrobe will never ever happen..it's a lie I often tell myself). Which reminds me of last Christmas. For some reason, I get really into Christmas shopping and feel the need to shower everyone I know with gifts. Last year, I went a little overboard and distinctly remember some salesgirl trying to con me into adding more items to my purchase and I told her "haha, if I buy anything else, my credit card will literally combust"...she thought I was being funny, I was being dead serious. 

So, I've decided to share with you some more items on my wish list, once again, these are part of a "wish" list, so don't go running to conclusions that I'm a spoiled brat...I can't help having good taste people! ;)

Actually, I'll take any of these items any day, not just for Christmas! 

• A romantic getaway either, here, here, here,  here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here,  or here! (Seriously, I'll go to any one of those, I'm not THAT difficult)
• THIS delicious Burberry silk robe...I will forever be adding robes to my collection, there will never be enough robes in this world for me.
• THIS Marc Jacobs tote, because of my deep love and appreciation for all that is animal print. 
• THIS gorgeous black TIBI dress. Love the beaded embellishments!
• THIS ridiculously amazing Rachel Gilbert gown...now I just need somewhere to wear it!
• THIS stunning Herve Leger...hell I'll take THIS one too...because who doesn't need some Herve in their life?
• To satisfy my constant craving for sleepwear...THIS
• And either one of these delightful baubles to spruce up my collection...why is Kenneth Jay Lane such a genius?? See here, here, here, and here!

So, now that I've satisfied my Christmas List cravings, I have to move on to the fact that it's not even Thanksgiving and I still have to tackle final papers for grad school...misery. 

In other brief news, I actually went for the navy blue nails! I chose "russian navy" by OPI and must say that after staring at my nails in horror the first two hours, I've actually come to like it!

my nails are nowhere near that long, so I think it looks better. Oh, and I don't often wear fur hats, just coats!

Happy Friday Mes Amis! May you find many fashionable finds and have more shopping self control than I have! 

Titillating Tuesday

I like the word titillating, titillation, it's fun, suggestive maybe, but basically just fun. Nothing particularly titillating has happened this bright beautiful day, but I just thought I'd put it up there for a tease...

This will be a compilation of random tidbits, since I'm done with my last midterm, and now I can breathe free for like...a day or two. 

This really freaks me out/irks me/grosses me out: When someone is talking on the phone or brushing their teeth in a public bathroom. First, the talking on the phone...while in the stall...that's just disgusting and I don't think I need to explain why. Lock yourself in the supply closet or go out to your car, outside, ANYWHERE but the bathroom because A. it's DISGUSTING and B. it's creepy when a voice is coming out of the stall and you think someone's trying to talk to you, but they're not, and it's awkward. Ok enough. Now: brushing teeth. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about oral hygiene. I love having sparkly minty fresh breath and pearly whites, HOWEVER I feel that I would be risking my health if I brushed in the PUBLIC restroom. Do you know how many germs fly around there? Ugh. I can't even think about it because I might lose my breakfast. So if you are one of those people who either talks on the cell or brushes in the bathroom, I'll be that girl giving you the disgusted look. Nothing personal, I just think you're kinda gross, but have a grrrrreat day!

Ok, I don't like to discuss my personal dating habits or relationship status on here because 1. I don't know you that well (yet) 2. I like to keep those things to myself usually. Here's the thing, and this is characteristic of me regardless of whether I'm in a relationship or not. I have a face that does not hide much emotion, which is why I'm a bad liar. I used to kind of date/see/flirt with a bartender/singer-songwriter in Nashville and he once told me that he wished he had a video recording of me while at a bar. Mind you, the presence of alcohol in my blood only leads to the magnification of my honesty and tell-tale facial expressions. If a creepster came up to me and my friends to flirt, I'd either fake being foreign and "no speaky englich" or I'd look at them like they were Freddy Kreuger and they'd promptly get the hint. I'm not particularly proud of this fact, but I just don't see the point in masking my real feelings, it's better if you know it's just not going to work from the get-go right? No false illusions? 

However, someone recently (this weekend) told me that I need to work on my finesse in awkward situations. I just wish I was better at giving out fake numbers, that way I wouldn't have to do the awkward "Oh, I'm out of town for the rest of the month" line (which I used this past weekend) or, "Sure...I'll call you". (Apparently these are really "mean" and I should work on the "gentle letdown"...to me, a letdown is a letdown right!?)  I'm usually very good at knowing whether or not I'll be attracted to someone within the first ten minutes of meeting. If I think I might like you, I'll go out with you; if not, then I'll probably say something weird, tell you I'm out of town for the rest of the year, or you'll trick me into going out with you, and I'll be super awkard the whole time, making awful conversation, and not being able to mask the fact that I'm dying inside, and then I'll tell you I'm out of town for the rest of the year so I won't have to go out with you again. Like I said, I'm a bad liar, so usually the "I'll be out of town" line is spoken while trying to not nervously laugh. 

I've given a fake number once. And it backfired. Majorly. The guy asked for my number, let's say my phone number is 999.999.9999. Well, I told him my number was 998.999.9999. So it wasn't a blatantly wrong number. My phone was in my small purse... in my hand...in plain view. He immediately called my "phone" so I could have his number....my phone didn't ring. He said "why isn't it ringing" I turned beet red, and said, "oh...maybe you didn't type it in correctly"...So I was FORCED to give him the right one. I saved him in my phone as "DO NOT ANSWER"....problem solved. 

Moral of the story: I'm bad at lying and giving fake numbers, but I'm good at giving off the "I'm not interested vibe", but it's usually done awkardly. When I'm interested in someone, I'll answer their calls, answer their texts, and be friendly. When I'm not...well you know what happens. 

Example: I was out this weekend, and a particularly creepy gentleman approached me and Sarah. He said "do you ladies need a drink?" My first thought is..."uhhh no thanks, I don't care for roofie coladas", but instead, I give Sarah a blank stare and say "QUE!?"...so I tried to pull the foreign thing...She, being the wonderful wing-woman that she is, said this "She's effing with you, she really DOES speak English"....So I give her an evil glare, turn to Mr. Weirdo, and say "oh..woops..just kidding"...He makes some completely asinine comment, and Sarah sees me struggling since my timespan for creative lies has come and gone and I might be forced to say something truthful (which could turn out to be incredibly rude). She cuts in (thank you Lord) and says "she's actually pregnant"...I play along. I secretly moved my ring to my ring finger, hold it up and proudly say "Yep! I'm married and I just found out I'm preggers!" (I had a beer in my hand...) So, we look smug, and are sure that he's going to say "oh, sorry" and walk away...but no, that'd be too easy. He looks at me and says, "I like that about you..." At this point, I'm about to cry salty tears of frustration because Frankenstein won't leave me the eff alone, so I just turn around and walk away. Once again...no ability to give the "gentle letdown". 

Enough with me and my brutal honesty. I'm just happy that the weather is amazing! I've got lots of ear candy for you today, so go download!

Musique Du Jour: 

Back to Black- Amy Winehouse

Piano Song- Meiko

Swans- Unkle Bob

Still Allright- Adam Merrin

All I Want From You Is Love- Let's Go Sailing

Eulogy- The Hereafter

Boring- The Pierces

Infinity- Merrick

A Good Start- Maria Taylor

Make This Go On Forever- Snow Patrol

Swimmers- Broken Social Scene

Blindsided- Bon Iver

Time Won't Let Me Go- The Bravery

(If You're Wondering If I Want You To ) I Want You To- Weezer

Soil Soil- Tegan and Sara

Edie- The Cult

The Light- Mirah

Destiny- Zero 7

Night Over Manuas (Soulboy Collection) - Boozoo Bajou

The Reeling- Passion Pit

Escape Me- DJ Tiesto feat. C.C. Sheffield

Bend It Like You Don't Care- DJ Tiesto

Metropolitain- Emanuel Santarromana (On Hotel Costes Vol. 6)
The Heinrich Maneuver- Interpol
No Buses- Arctic Monkeys

Saturday Shenanigans

Bonjour Mes Amis, 

I've got some nasty back/neck issues (thank you cheerleading, volleyball and various athletic trainers/coaches) so I'm writing through the fog of a nasty headache that is a result of a messed up neck. 

Graduate school is killing me slowly, and I have a midterm on Monday, which I am not happy about. So, instead of having an amazingly enjoyable weekend, I will be worrying about this stupid exam on Monday the whole time.   Come May, I will be having an extremely large party with copious amounts of "magic warming juice" (see the post about the trial skinny jeans)...yes, you're all invited don't worry. 

Ok, so on to more exciting things...

1.) I bought some amazing things on Thursday. Among those amazing things are 

a. A vintage bomber jacket with a fox collar. It's a nude/taupe colored sueded jacket, with vintage silver snap buttons that are tres chic, and the foxy collar is just that, FOXY. 

b. An amazing shrunken blazer with a mandarin style collar, it's a dark grey velvet blazer, with grey sequin detailing all along the lapels, it's insanity. I heart it. I'm wearing it tonight.

c. A cute dark red Michael Stars top, because who doesn't love them some Michael Stars?

A story for your entertainment:

Last night, I was re-hashing recent events over drinks with S and S at an English style pub. S1 and I were deep in conversation about Gretchen from the Real Housewives of Orange County, and I had to run to the restroom mid-convo. So this pub has the bathrooms labeled  "Lads" and "Lasses". I have been there several times, but I was so engrossed in our conversation that I stormed into what I thought was "Lasses" and was greeted by several disgruntled looking gentlemen mid-tinkle. Me, being awkward and totally caught off guard yelped, "OH JESUS CHRIST!!!!" and slammed the door behind me in total crazy lady form. Then I had to slink across the bar on my way back to our booth avoiding eye contact with any of the poor "Lads" who I had potentially creeped on. 

awkward.

So hopefully none of you will mistakenly creep on weeing men, and hopefully all of you have an amazing rest of the weekend sans looming midterms in the future. And if you DO run into the wrong bathroom, don't be awkward and yell the Lord's name, maybe just say "oops sorry" and calmly non-awkwardly walk out. 

Hump Day Hilarity

Ok, so I don't know how hilarious this post will really be, but I just realized this morning how much I love the word hilarity...I just do. I also love the word animosity, vacillation, henceforth, heretofore, etc. etc. I had a dream that involved crossword puzzles and a psychic dog (I have insanely weird dreams) , and it made me remember how much I LOVE crossword puzzles, I used to work on them in college on a daily basis because they were on the back of the school newspapers (of course I did them in class...duh). I'm kind of a word freak, I used to win spelling bees in elementary and middle school like a champ. In seventh grade I won second place because the hottest 8th grade guy was sitting in the first row watching, (Meredith from (flash) pasteurized will know who it was) and he distracted me with his gorgeous smile so I mis-spelled deodorant....it was worth the smile though.

Ok people, I need help. I gave up Diet Coke this week. My addiction had gotten really bad this semester, and I just read an article about how bad it is, so I decided to give it up (this is like the 9857948 time I've given it up.) A couple years back I gave all sodas up, and I lasted like a year and a half! So, I'm going for a long streak, although right now I'm about to claw someone's face off for a DC, but I'm going to make some tea instead. I got really excited last night because I got two new boxes of tea ( I live on tea). 

In other news, I'm getting my nails done on Friday, I'm a french manicure kind of girl, although I've gone dark in the past. So, I'm in the process of deciding what to do...I'm thinking of doing the navy thing, like this (the inspiration was taken from here)

I want to do something maybe a little bit more navy...but who knows, I might chicken out and go back to the old French. Opinions? 

Ok, so yesterday, Sarah from ALifeMoreExciting and MODG were debating about the DCC (Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders). While I love Dallas, my obsession is concentrated on one person. That person is Olivia Palermo. Yes, you heard me right. Some may aspire to be a DCC, but I aspire to be Olivia Palermo. I think she's absolutely gorgeous, and she's that perfect amount of bitchy that just makes her a badass. I don't watch "The City", but if it's on, and she's in the episode, I'll drop whatever I'm doing to watch. People who are avid watchers may think she's a huge raging be-otch, but I think she's amazing, maybe if I watched the show more I'd agree, but I doubt it. So there it is, my celebrity girl crush...

Musique Du Jour: 

Still- Matt Nathanson

Sunday Best- Augustana

Head Up In The Clouds- Powderfinger

My Heart- The Perishers

Brandy Alexander- Feist

Whatever Lola Wants (Gotan Project Remix) - Sarah Vaughan & Gotan Project

You Belong To Me- Jason Wade

Vienna- The Fray

I Still Remember- Bloc Party

Runaway Car- Matt Kearney

Wardrobe and Music Favorites Of The Week:

Bonjour Loves, 

Today I'm exhausted (I swear this time change has messed with my head somehow) so I'm going to try to re-energize by listing my favorite fall wardrobe additions and new music favorites! 

WARDROBE PICKS:

-Coach Riding Boots. I'm obsessed with them. They're SO comfy, and they make everything look better, they just do. 

-Vintage cream colored 3/4 sleeve coat I found. Total miracle of the cloth. It's got lovely buttons down the front and a round neck, it looks spectacular on, and it's the perfect weight for the not so frigid winters down South. 

 

it kinda looks like this, but no collar, and more winter white.

-New Nanette Lepore black wool sweater dress with big sequins! It's so adorable, and looks like this Nanette Lepore dress that was apparently on some TV show I've never heard about:

-Cole Haan Suede/Patent woven Hobo. It's HUGE, it's beautiful, it's just perfection. I highly recommend it. 

- My new vintage fur vest. I wore it for Halloween, but I'll totally wear it again. There's a picture below!

MUSIC PICKS:

- I'm currently in love with a band called "The Rescues" they're super upbeat, but the lyrics are great as well. I highly highly recommend them! I've got a ton of their music listed in previous posts. 

-The Pierces. A funky new group I'm loving. Download, "It Was You" "Boring" "Secret" and anything else that tickles your fancy. They're definitely a new favorite. 

-I used to be anti-Lilly Allen, but I've heard a few songs of hers that make me laugh, and laughing is always fun!

-Jem. This woman is amazing. She got her start promoting music and scouting bands, randomly decided to cut an album, and VOILA...perfection! Some favorites include: "Missing You" "Falling For You" "They" "24" "Come on Closer"

-Ingrid Michaelson. I love her. Period. Download it all. She's got such a pretty voice, and I love her lyrics. 

-"Brandy Alexander" and "Honey Honey" by Feist. She's got some great music!

-Definitely try out "The Gotan Project" they've got smooth rhythms and beats that will relax you, but still make you want to shake it a little...and who doesn't love to shake it?

-"Sour Cherry" by The Kills. Great song.

-Bitter:Sweet. These two are amazing! They both had their own gigs, and met over an online ad, and magic has ensued! Download "Dirty Laundry" "Don't Forget to Breathe" and "The Mating Game". A lot of the re-mixes are good too.

-"The Show" by Lenka. This is a cute little girly song. Just because.

-"Be Careful What You Tell the Sky" by January. This song is really cool, I just discovered it!

-I can never get enough of Ray Lamontagne or Damien Rice. They're both a-mazing songwriters who happen to have vocal talents that are just plain out of this world. Both are soul-shakingly amazing vocalists. Download. All of it. Now.

-If you've never heard of Citizen Cope,  well now you have. This man is a true talent. He's also got some amazing pipes, but he's also able to create his sound through so many genres, he will rock your socks off. promise. 

-Vampire Weekend. Another great new-ish band that makes me smile, I love their stuff. 

-If you don't know what the Hotel Costes is, please go find out, stat. I'm a huge fan in particular of Vol. X. It's a music staple. 

-"Creator" by Santigold. Good fun. Beware of extreme funkiness and crazy beats. 

-Bloc Party.  I became a huge fan about 4 years back when they first kind of came out. They've got great variety and I promise you will love.

That's all for now, I've still got lots to recommend, but I want to keep you coming back for more! Stay tuned, and have an amazing Tuesday.

The Tale of the "Trial" Skinny Jeans...

It's been a bit since my last Tale From the Hanger, so I figured I'd indulge you with this one. It's an oldie, but a goodie. 

January 2008: Nashville, TN. 

Skinny jeans had become a big trend, but I was definitely not too eager to jump on them quite yet. Over Christmas break, I decided to try them out, a "trial" pair. I'm only 5'4, and playing volleyball for years doesn't make me have birdlike legs...so I was terrified of looking shorter and squatty...So I decided to buy a mid-range brand of skinny jeans to see how much I liked them. Well, in case you're wondering, I now own about 10 pair of skinny pants...the "trial" pair worked!

These "trial" skinnies were super dark wash denim, perfect for going out. Nashville in January is FRIGID, the kind of cold that seeps into your bones and never seems to go away no matter how many layers you stack on.

This particular story begins with one frigid night, and a pub crawl. I don't know what it is about the cold weather, but it seems to make people drink more...This night was one of those "drink more to stay warm" nights, and me and the girls were on a mission to stay warm. I paired the "trial" skinnies with some gorgeous gorgeous bone colored heels, and a matching bone colored cashmere v-neck, a warm scarf, and no jacket (I hate schlepping jackets around bars).  We went to our favorite Irish bar, and began the festivities. A good friend of mine from Texas was out, and he is really such a nice young man. "George" came with us to the next few bars, being his normal nice self. Then things got hazy...and much warmer...

Seems to me that the "warming effect" was also taking hold of dear Georgie, and me, being so focused on keeping the libations flowing, was oblivious to this. Finally, the closing bell rang, and we all shuffled outside to the night which was magically warmer. My friend Sophie had become enamored with a new prospect, and he had offered to drive us home. George also offered a ride, but I declined, saying that I would have to be Sophie's chaperone to make sure her new love wasn't a murderer/psycho. George said he was having an after party at his house, and I told him he could get a pledge to come pick me up at my apartment and I'd come join the party as soon as potential psycho dropped us off. 

We got into potential psycho's car, and here is where it gets funny. I feel the need to protect my girl friends as if they were my own family. I actually really get into it sometimes. To the point of hilarity, some would say.

So, once we buckled up, the interrogations began. Keep in mind, I had been ingesting copious amounts "magic warming juice", so my questions were a bit more probing than I would usually venture to ask. Turns out, Sophie was actually going to go home with the chap and "watch a movie" so I felt the need to ask as many questions as possible should I have to be a witness in a murder/kidnapping case, or call the police. I had already told him I memorized his license plate number (pshhh...yeah right), I asked him for his social security number, I checked his name against his ID, a credit card, and asked to see his major league baseball card (he was a pro baseball player), I also asked several questions regarding any potential criminal record, threatened his life several times, and told him I had "people" in the FBI and CIA (all completely untrue). Once I realized that there was no way Sophie was going to stay with me, I gave up and gave him a menacing glare as they drove off...Sophie later told me that the poor guy (who she actually ended up dating for a while!) was kind of terrified of me...I play "mean cop" really well...

George had sent a pledge to pick me up, and BY CAR the drive is only about 3-5 minutes down one street. George lived off the main street in Nashville, comparable to a "Main Street" if you will. It's always very busy, and there are always many police officers scouting for DUI's, speeding etc. etc. I lived off the same street, only about 2 miles down. The pledge dropped me off, and I was suddenly very perplexed. I didn't hear "party" noises. I shuffled up to the front door, made sure I was at the right house, and meekly knocked. It was FRIGID, and I started pounding...soon enough, George opened up....to a pitch black house. 

"Um...George, I thought you were having a party? Where are your roommates? Where's the party?"

"Oh...well, I guess no one ended up showing up...it's just the two of us..""

OH.DEAR.GOD.

I had been tricked. trapped. ensnared. George had lured me into his mantrap, and I needed to escape. He inched closer, and closer, and I panicked. I spastically jerked around him, and locked myself in the bathroom. Great. Brilliant. It's 3 am....I start dialing numbers. I call every girlfriend and roommate in my phone, no answer. Of course. I unlock the bathroom door, peek my head out, and am once again accosted by George. I was starting to get annoyed. I needed a way out. I had no idea the "trial" skinnies would be so alluring. 

I asked George to please drive me home. He said he couldn't because he was too drunk. Strike One. 

I asked George to call the pledge and tell him to come pick me up and drive me home. He said pledges were off duty after 3 am. Strike Two. 

George suggests I take a cab. Morsel of Knowledge: I despise cabs. Especially when I've been drinking, I don't know why, but I refuse to take cabs by myself late at night. Maybe because Nashville was notorious for rapist cab drivers and crazy cab drivers in general. After you've been pulled over for 2 hours because your cabbie is illegally in the country, then you'll understand. 

I tell George I hate cabs, plus I don't have cash anymore so I'm not about to take a cab. Strike Three. 

I ask George to give me a coat. He looks confused, but I'm out of creative ways to get home short of conjuring up a magic carpet. He hands me the coat, looking puzzled, and I BOLT. QUICKLY. I slammed the front door behind me, leaving behind a very confused George, and I tear down the sidewalk in my skinnies. The sidewalk down to the main street had a couple stairs, which I flew down, but I didn't notice the half-covered man-hole. And then....

I fell into the man-hole. Hard. Extremely un-gracefully.  I had one leg in the man-hole, up to my waist (thank the sweet sweet Lord it wasn't full of sewage) and the other leg was half in, half twisted above the man-hole. I was face-down on concrete. What did I do? I FLEW up, and RAN. Don't ask me how I got out, or how I got up, but I did, and I ran...two miles... in the freezing wee hours of the morning...in heels...with a large man-coat. I don't understand how a cop didn't see me, but it must have been the light speed I was sprinting at. 

I text messaged about 10 friends saying this (this is literally what I wrote) "FELL IN A DITCH...LURKS REAL BAD" translation: fell in a ditch, hurts real bad. 

I flew into my building, tore into my apartment, stood in the hallway, and tore my skinnies off...just as my roommate's "man-friend" "Billy" walked out of her room. I'm standing in my undies and a sweater, freezing. Poor "Billy" had the deer in headlights look, and then he looked down at my ankle...which was bleeding...profusely. Cora, my roommate came out in a robe, screeched at my ankle, and told me I needed to get help. I told her I was fine... I was actually laughing about it somehow, but she forced me into the shower where she poured peroxide and I laughed and told her she was "being silly". I clambered into bed in my undies and sweater to pass out. 

9 am. I wake up, feeling great! (This was back when I didn't know what a hangover was...yeah I was one of those lucky folk who never got hangovers...till a year ago) I bounce out of bed and SCREAM BLOODY MURDER. WHY was I in blinding pain, and WHY was my ankle the size of a ripe orange??? Oh wait, why did I have a huge scrape across my chest? Why did I have a GASH across my right ankle? It all came back...slowly and painfully. George and his wily trick to lure me back had caused me to look like I had been tossed off the back of an 18 wheeler into oncoming traffic. 

Sidenote: I'm terrified of doctors and needles, so unless I'm about to lose an appendage or near death, I refuse to see a doctor. 

So, instead of going to the doctor and getting a tetanus shot (thank goodness I didn't end up NEEDING to have one) and stitches, I laid in agony on the couch all day. My mother screamed at me after I sent her a picture over the phone, and told me to go to the doctor immediately. I refused. The swelling finally came down about 2 days later, but I still have a scar on my ankle, and the skinnies have a hole in the ankle where my heel went through them...so both of us experienced the terror of nearly falling completely into a man-hole/sewer. 

We'll definitely never be the same, we've got the scars to prove it. 

Moral of the Story: Beware of sneaky, wily "Georges", when in need, GO TO THE DOCTOR, and never strip down into your underwear until you're positive there are no randoms in the vicinity.